Goodbye For Now

I feel as if I’ve been on autopilot for this entire semester. My last semester. I was so focused on completing tasks in my courses and fulfilling every requirement as the executive editor. It left me without a point in time when I really soaked in the fact that I only had a few months left at the University of New Haven. And now, it’s turned into only a few weeks.

My journey through Horseshoe Magazine was a bit different from other people’s. I was in an interpretive and editorial writing class where what we chose to write for the course would most likely end up published in either the newspaper or magazine. Being focused on getting a good grade in the class, I never once planned on contributing to the magazine once the spring 2025 semester was over.

I had already spoken to Susan Campbell, my advisor, about classes that fall and knew I would be contributing to something since I was registered for the journalism practicum. I had more experience writing for the newspaper, so that was my instinctive answer if I had to choose where I was going to write to earn the points for the practicum. I’d lay low. Fly under the radar and pass.

Until Haiden Leach, the magazine’s managing editor at the time, sent me an email about wanting to talk after class.

I’ll be honest. I think I had around four conversations with her in total, so I had no idea why she would want to talk to me. But when I did, her and Elisa, the executive editor, sat across from me and explained how they wanted me to take Haiden’s place since she was graduating. And the semester after that, Elisa would be graduating. Meaning within a year, I would become the executive editor.

I remember my face growing red as the two of them overloaded me with compliments on my writing. They made direct eye contact with me as well, which made me squirm even more. It’s not necessarily that the attention was uncomfortable. I just wasn’t used to being seen. I can still picture the big smiles on their faces after they explained how everything would work, and how they grabbed each other's hands when they asked, “So…would you be interested?”

So much for laying low.

I didn’t have anything to do right off the bat because it was the end of the semester, but I still got to sneak my interpretive piece, which I did for extra credit, into the final edition. Called “Cardinal,” it was a discussion about my belief in feeling the presence of my deceased loved ones whenever I saw that particular bird. While writing the piece was something I did on a whim, I ended up winning first place in the Society of Professional Journalists (SPJ) contest under the column/commentary category. I didn’t even know Campbell submitted any of my pieces.

For someone who was used to feeling like I faded into the background, recognition was a whole new experience for me. Recognition for something I loved to do. And I would get to write about whatever I wanted for the next two semesters. 

I approached my managing editor role in the way I know best, with anxiety. That, and just a splash of perfectionism. I spent the first couple of weeks feeling like I was messing everything up instead of helping in any way. I don’t cope well with not immediately being good at something the moment that I try it out. I learned how to properly complete my tasks rather quickly, but knowing of the inevitable graduation of the executive editor who could ease my woes with her melodic laughter loomed over me.

I want to thank Elisa for believing in me when I felt discouraged about stepping into her role after she graduated. There were lots of times when I would send her novel-length texts about how I didn’t feel like I would live up to my peers’ expectations or that I wouldn’t know what I was doing. Her replies were always simple, but encouraging.

“You’re already doing it.”

That’s what Elisa would tell me every time. She knew I was ready before I did. And while I started to believe her, I still hesitated to ever say “I’m ready” out loud in fear of setting myself up for failure because I might sound too confident. The higher the expectation you have for yourself means more chances where you could be disappointed. That was my logic. Flawed and filled with self-doubt.

Don’t think I had some sort of revelation or anything. That logic is still my default, but I’ve learned to give myself more grace over these last couple of months. I’ve learned that asking questions is okay, but when you ask the same thing multiple times, you need to find that reassurance within yourself that you know what you’re doing instead of constantly checking with someone “higher up.”

I want to thank Patch for not only being the best investigative editor you could ever ask for, but also for stepping up to the plate to be the administrative editor for the magazine. Elisa provided ease because of how extroverted she was, but Patch brought great comfort because I felt like they understood me. They didn’t make me feel bad for taking a while to come out of my shell. They were patient and were always there for me if I needed someone to talk to.

I also want to thank Abby, my managing editor and soon-to-be executive editor, for also helping me along the way. I honestly knew from the end-of-semester party in spring 2025, my first time meeting her, that I wanted Abby to be my managing editor. If I wasn’t texting paragraphs to Elisa, I was sending them to Abby. Out of everyone on the staff, Abby has been here the longest. She has watched the executive editor at the time build the magazine from the ground up to turn Horseshoe into what it is today.

She has the most experience in the magazine, which is why I know it’s in good hands.

I want to thank Azam for his charming randomness, which was able to pull me out of my funk if I ever felt low on energy. I want to thank Djemima for agreeing to be my literary editor even though she was nervous. I knew that someone with that kind of dedication and creativity deserved to be in charge of that section. I want to thank Taylor and Anaylee for agreeing to join when Abby sought them out in their shared English classes. I was amazed at how quickly those two were able to catch on to how the magazine worked in such a short amount of time.

Lastly, I want to thank Campbell for pushing me to write for the newspaper and the magazine. If it weren’t for her, I would have never found the place that makes me feel like I belong somewhere.

Signing off,

Gabriella Pinto