I’m Graduating a Semester Early. I Wish I Wasn’t.

Photo by Emily Ranquist:

By: Lynelle Fernandez

When I was in high school, I took five Advanced Placement (AP) courses that transferred as credit when I enrolled in college. Having 15 credits before my first semester meant I was able to graduate in three and a half years instead of the usual four. Although I’ll finish classes this December, I will attend Commencement with the rest of my senior peers next May.

This should be great news. Why am I not excited?

There are plenty of upsides to an early graduation: I don’t have to pay tuition for another semester, I won’t have finals to take and I’ll be free from the stresses of schoolwork. On the other hand, I’ll no longer have the academic lifestyle I’ve had for as long as I can remember. 

 I think of the classes I won’t be able to take, like spring-exclusive courses or the ones that never fit in my schedule. If I could have one more semester, I’d spend the time taking electives in the fields I never got to explore. This semester, I registered for Introduction to Acting on a whim and I’ve been enjoying it more than I expected. I wonder what my experience would have been like if I had pursued theater more in-depth. Would I have found a passion for studying drama from an academic lens? Would I have joined the theater program as a crew or cast member? Were there opportunities and friendships I missed out on that could have changed my college experience?

I think of the social aspects of college life I’ll miss out on. Although I wasn’t an avid attendee of campus events, the people I’ve met at this university through organizations and classes have changed me for the better. This not only includes my classmates and fellow club members but also the professors who showed me great kindness and attentiveness. After spending four years of high school without making friends, I fully expected to spend another four years alone. In retrospect, I don’t think I could have gotten this far without support from others.

I think of  the personal lessons I’ve learned along the way. Three years ago, I was aware of my flaws but didn’t always know how to work on them. Recognition is a good first step, but progress comes from trial and error. From social fumbles to academic blunders, failures opened an opportunity to step back and analyze what went wrong. Although it is impossible to undo past mistakes, the best way to utilize them is to apply them to the future. What was once embarrassing and harrowing to look back on gets recycled into newfound wisdom, like compost for a garden.

In the end, what is there to gain from all this thinking? By yearning for the past, you drag its dead weight forward. What has already happened cannot be changed. Danger arises when such thoughts delve into the hypothetical or unknown. 

There’s a joy to be found in that part of life: you can never truly predict what the world has in store for you. Life is full of surprises and unexpected circumstances that impede any attempt to predict the future. Four years ago, I convinced myself I would end college friendless and jobless. As someone who is currently neither of those, I am incredibly grateful for the experiences that got me to this point. While I would have loved another semester to deepen my connections and learn more things, I know I will look back fondly on my college memories.

My story is not over; it’s just the end of a chapter. The only way to find out what comes next is to have the courage to turn the page.